A Heartbreaking Love Story! First Love First Heartbreak
"I was innocent. I was at one of the lowest point in my life. "
I wish I could go back and redo everything I regretted.
I was a 9th grader, facing the most difficult exams in my life. It was like hell on earth. I told myself if i didn't pass those 4 tests, I'm going to die, literally. Call me crazy, call me dramatic, call me drama queen, but i swear it was very difficult that i risked my reputation in high school. You know that phrase "love drops your IQ"? Well it turned out, it happened to me even though i was skeptical about it. Let's back it up a little. It all started in 2011, when i wanted to do a good deed for myself to be "more positive in life". I started to think of other people's good qualities. By other people, i mean those people in my class whom i don't really care about.
There was this boy. He was not handsome nor tall. He wasn't smart or kind. I guess that's why i try to point out good things about him. It is tough. Like, that person is not a nice person in general, although he did grow taller. Anyway, long story short, i ended up staring at him for a while..trying to figure out his good qualities. Suddenly he caught me staring at him and now he's staring at me. In my defense, i was trying to do something nice.
A moment later. . . he told his friends that i liked him. I was like, HOLD ON A MILLISECOND
How disgusting of him to say THAT while I'm doing something well..NICE. I'm not trying to be rude or something, but the guy's just not my type. Weeks later, i realized that staring is really powerful for opposite sex. I think he started to develop feelings for me because he's actually been trying to INTERACT with me in many many possible ways.
One year later, it was report day on first semester. Almost all of my 8th grade classmate opened their report card. I was worried that I'll get many red marks, but to my surprise i didn't get a lot of them, well.. except for history and business studies. Bummer....
Anyway, that guy, let's call him O. O was never one class with me ever since the 7th grade. I decided to open my report card starting by ripping that envelope in the middle of no one. After being impressed about my report card, O and his "gang" showed up and his guy friends said "hey it's your girl". I was like, "is there any other female here? Please". That went on until 9th grade.
Back to the story.
I started to feel for his efforts in pursuing "first love" and well i kinda fell for it. It was a puppy crush love. The reason why it's called puppy crush love is because we were never a couple. Why? O's too coward to confess to me and I was always kind of avoiding and ignoring him, which i think crushed his hope like a little bug that's crushed to the ground harshly. In my defense, there was a girl that liked him and for Pete's sake, she was in his class and she was kind of his close female friend. Hey, i was giving this girl a chance for love. Love triangle popped into the picture.
I've heard people in my batch, especially from other classes, whispers and talks about why a quiet, loser, and unpopular girl would get the attention of a talkative, basketball player and popular guy like him. It seems unlikely. Don't even ask me why. I don't even know that until the power of staring came to realization.
"Like, realizing stuff"-Kylie Jenner
My IQ kind of dropped a little because i was thinking i was special and that a guy actually likes me for who i am. I got treated like a lady with kindness and joy.
If you're single like me, you know what sucks.
Heartbreak. In this case, i was the heart breaker. Almost everyone in my batch blames me. Can you believe that?! Deep down, i have never genuinely like him. It was just an illusion of me being liked by other people and possibly being in a relationship that brings me happiness.
Speaking of which, i worked hard for my 4 exams and received pretty good results like Bs and As. At the end of the day,working hard does pay off even though the first try might not be successful. Eventually, it will work out. I know this sounds so cheesy, but it happens to my pathetic life, or so i thought.
Remember. If Thomas Alpha Edison did like a million trials and succeed, you can also succeed.